God and I

I don’t believe in God.
I was in search of God when I was 13. I searched, searched and searched. Why do we even have go to 'certain' places to meet God when God is everywhere? Well, do you think there are some places not good enough for God to be in?

Then one fine day I found that there is no way to find God who has always been here, and everywhere and within everyone. God is you, I and every one around you.

We keep asking God something or other. But that is like saying that we know ourselves better than God. And we always think that we know better what is good for us.

The only thing I can talk about are the moments when I feel closer to Him. These glimpses of God happen as a sudden feeling of unlimited unconditional love. It's a love of such an intensity that it feels like I am going to burst into hundreds and thousands of pieces if I don't get to hug somebody at that very moment. Sometimes, these moments come when I get closer to pure nature; When I am one with the nature; When I lie down on a green lawn and feel the smell of the earth with my whole body; When I breathe deep and realize how tender it is to breathe and how amazing it is that it happens without our doing anything about it; When I see leaves dances to the rhythme of wind; When the roaring noise of the sea penetrates deep into my soul and draws me into it without me asking for it;

Yes. I don’t believe in God. Why do I need to believe in something that I feel so strong about? I don't believe in God, because there is no need to believe. I can feel the presence of God. But why to even use the word 'God'. I am trying to name the force within me and around me that leads to so much love, so much hate, so much pain.